We seem to live in a generation where dating and committing to one person at a young-ish age is frowned upon. We live in a generation where one night stands and hooks ups are practically rewarded, but being monogamous for the long-term is weird. We live in a generation where dates aren’t really a thing anymore, and where commitment is damn near nonexistent. Now, don’t get me wrong. You want to go live life and not be tied down in a relationship? Perfectly fine, no judgement from me. At the same token, I would hope that my long-term, committed relationship that began when we were 15 and 16 years old would be given that same respect. I’ve read and heard a lot of comments about ‘what it’s like’ being young and in for the long haul with someone. For example…
‘It’s like leaving a party at 9 o’clock’
This literally could not be any more false for those who are truly wanting to be in a committed relationship. So we ‘leave the party at 9 o’clock’? What’s so terrible about that? We get to go back to house and put on our pj’s and eat cold pizza while watching our favorite show on Netflix. ‘Netflix and chill?” No thanks.
‘You don’t get to do the things you love anymore’
I’ve really never understood this one. People say ‘oh you can’t travel the world now!’ I’m sorry, is there somewhere in the handbook of life that says you can only travel the world when you’re single? And who says I even want to travel the world? (I mean I do, but that’s besides the point) If you’re not with a person who enjoys doing at least some of the same things you do, that could be a problem (in my opinion at least.. if that works for you, then by all means keep doin’ what you’re doin’!). I’m really not quite sure why people assume that a committed couple sits shackled to the same two chairs day in and day out.
‘How do you know s/he is the one?’
I’m going to pretend that anyone who asks me that is joking. How do you know that chocolate ice cream will always your favorite flavor? Or that your favorite shirt will always be your favorite? Or that you’ll always love your current car? Are you going to spend the rest of your life committed to trying new ice cream flavors or test driving cars you may or may not end up buying? Most likely not. I happened to find the person that makes me happy and that I would be irreversibly sad if I lost, so why isn’t that good enough?
‘Being with the same person all the time is boring’
This might be the case for some people who constantly need change, but let me tell you.. when you’re with the right person, you will almost constantly be having fun, like a nearly-annoying amount of fun. When you’ve been with the same person for so many years, I firmly believe that they begin to know you better than you know yourself. That’s how it is for me, anyway. He knows how to make me smile, he knows that I’m ridiculously ticklish in my sides. He knows that I can’t dance but prance around the silent kitchen anyway. And I know that no one is allowed to touch his feet, that he would watch sports all day if he could, and that squeezing me really hard during a hug makes him laugh. I actually find the opposite of that statement to be true; the mundane things that are normally boring are more fun with the love of your life. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been out shopping and nearly peed myself from laughing so hard. The all-nighter study sessions are more bearable because you aren’t alone when you hit the sleep deprived delirium. It’s not more boring, it’s actually more fun.
Our relationship might have started off in our freshman and sophomore years of high school at the ripe age of 15 and 16, but I wouldn’t trade a darn thing. I have grown up from being practically a child still into a young, responsible, and reliable adult with him. He has helped me through some of my lowest lows, and celebrated the best of times. And I have done the same for him. It’s been quite the road of twists and turns, but it’s led us here. and it’s exactly where I want to be.